We Made It, Mama

We made it, Mama. Our first Thanksgiving and Christmas without you. It was quiet and might not have happened at all if not for the shining, hopeful faces of your four beautiful granddaughters. We carried on as usual for the girls. I know you would have wanted it that way but I won't deny that it didn't feel like Christmas without your laugh, your Victorian-decorated Christmas tree, your Rotel dip and the joy of finding the perfect gift for you. There was an empty spot in all our hearts on Christmas Eve as we looked around and it became more obvious of the horrible loss we had to endure. A loss we can only endure because we must. I put last year's Christmas card from you in a safe place for me to treasure always. It is the last one and I can't bear to part with it. Every night I end my prayers with the same request, "Please Heavenly Father, just let Mama be happy." I know you are, sweet Mama.